Just a place where I can rant if I need to. Praise if I can. List my hopes and dreams if I have any. Be silly if I decide to. And if you don't like it...YOU CAN "KISS MY GRITS"!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


Yikes! I haven't posted in a week...good grief. I really have no excuse especially since I've been on couch arrest all weekend and yesterday (possibly today, we don't know yet). Yeah so, quick update on me:
*blood pressure slightly high on Friday
*ordered to lay around all weekend
*blood pressure higher on Monday
*ordered to lay around all day
*doc appt moved to today at 10:30am
*nervous about what they'll say
In many ways I hope that they say "let's just go ahead and induce, since your BP is staying higher than we'd like". The reality of that is, I might freak out a bit. I mean, I have these moments of "WHEN WILL MY BABY GET HERE?! I'M SOOO READY!" They are usually followed by "BABY!? WHO'S HAVING A BABY? ME?! REALLY?! WHAT IF I CAN'T TAKE THE PAIN AND FREAK OUT AND WHAT IF HE DOESN'T LIKE ME OR I DON'T LIKE HIM OR I SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST AND ARE YOU SURE THAT'S WHAT THIS BIG WIGGLY BELLY MEANS?!" Yeah...I guess that's all normal and stuff. It's just, I've been so excited and now that it's actually here (well maybe, well it's soon regardless) I'm having some freak out moments.
It kinda feels like the top of the water slide. You've waited all year for summer time to come and you finally convinced mom and dad to take you to the waterpark. Your cousins are flying down each slide laughing and having the time of their lives. You see this, you know how badly you want that too...but, you're scared-what if you're not as brave as them. You suck it up, singing to yourself (because that calms you down) you put the mat down on the slide, the kids behind you are waiting so you force yourself to go because as scared as you are you can't turn back now. It's pretty unnerving the whole way down, you're singing, you're praying (for what I don't know-that you don't fly out of the side of the slide or drown in the 2 feet of water at the end even though you know how to swim) and you make it to the end. You run out of the pool to the other kids and shout "which one's next?!" Wash-rinse-repeat.
Yeah, so I hope it's like that...especially since waterslides, in my experience, have been fun and painless!
I'll try to keep you informed, but if the baby appearance is imminent then it could be a while...or I could just be lazy like I've been for the past week and decided that there's nothing interesting going on in my life nor do I have anything worth reading to say, so avoid posting. Y'all keep posting though because I'm keepin' up with all of you!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

It's a musical life...

It will come as no surprise to many of you (if anyone is still reading, since I've been terrible about posting) that I LOVE MUSICALS! I am not a singer (though when I was younger my cousins and I sang quite often in our girl group "Kids in America"-we never really sought fame beyond the living room, but...) and despite my best efforts in college acting classes, I'm really no actress. But I love to watch them and dream about how I would LOVE to do that. Sing, dance, act, be on stage. Sometimes, when I listen to music I begin to reminisce about a time in my life that song reminds me of. Like yesterday, I heard Green Day's "Time of Your Life". Takes me back to freshman year of college, we were ice skating, I'd just broken up with my high school boyfriend and wondering if I'd done the right thing...then, I really listened to the words of that song "It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right...I hope you had the time of your life..." I felt better.

There are other songs that take me back to high school, and college, and shakin' dat azz on Franklin St...I like to think of these songs as a soundtrack to my life. Different songs mean different things and many times make me want to be walking across UNC's campus, alone, sun hitting my face, yet there is a chill in the air...I'm young, happy, confident in my newly found independence and I'm heading off to Bruegger's for lunch. Happy times.

That's not to say I don't have happy times nowadays, but some of my best memories take me back to college days. Life is about to change in ways that I can't even imagine. Whenever this baby boy decides to meet us here on the outside my life will never be the same. Happy will mean something new. Tiredness will take on a whole new level (so I hear) and my patience will be tried...My love will grow. But I really think I'll always be that little girl singing and dancing to Wilson Phillips in the living room "Hold on for one more day..." and hopefully I'll still be that high school cheerleader that listens to Green Day (mainly because the boy she had a crush on LOVED Green Day-some of you know who I'm talkin' 'bout) and mainly I hope I'll still be that carefree college chick that's just found independence walking across the greatest campus on the planet.

I know the soundtrack to my life will continue to change, but hopefully only because I add more songs to it. Over the past year or so my hubby and I have come to really love the music of Josh Radin (played on Scrubs and Grey's Anatomy among others)...we recently got his new CD and it's the kind of music where you want to listen to the whole CD. You don't get tired of it because they don't play it on the radio (but they should)...some songs seem so deep and meaning full...and others take me back to that college campus and wonder if anyone felt this way about me (though these words don't describe me): "...she drives a vegetable car, diesal mercedes, green two door, I barely know who you are, Lisa Loeb glasses I'd sure like to ask you to stay..."

Sounds silly, but it's such a fun song...I hope you hear a song that keeps you young and carefree today!