Just a place where I can rant if I need to. Praise if I can. List my hopes and dreams if I have any. Be silly if I decide to. And if you don't like it...YOU CAN "KISS MY GRITS"!

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Feed me Seymour!!

Have you ever wanted something so badly that you thought you, someone you love or someone you don't even know might perish in the process? If the answer is yes, then you have possibly been pregnant before or you're just crazy. So it goes like this...Food is tricky lately. Even though I've been feeling a lot better the past 2 days, it's still hard to figure out what "sounds good" to eat. Lately, I don't cook because A#1 I am WAAY too tired to do that by the time I get home B#2 The thought of cooking grosses me out. Plus, I can only eat exactly when I'm hungry and exactly what sounds decent.
So tonight...I left work 20minutes early because I HAD TO GET A TOTINO'S PIZZA AND I HAD TO HAVE IT THEN. I am not even kidding you. I have not had cravings that bad. This I think was an obsession. The moment I thought Totino's sounded like something edible, it quickly moved from "only edible" to "the only thing in the entire galaxy that sounds edible". I really thought that if someone tried to stand in my way I'd go all Butner Psycho style on them and then be sent to UNC for observation. I can talk about this now because the pizza is sitting safely in my belly and I've started cooking the brownies (hey, I didn't even have to crack an egg, it was the squeeze from the tube kind).
OMG!! Only one pepperoni left, thank God because I really would have fought all 80's-gotta-have-that-cabbagepatchkid-style if anyone else had tried to get that pepperoni pizza!

Dear Mr and Mrs Totino,
I have loved your pizza since college. In an effort to keep the pounds down I have in the past few years only eaten them as a treat. I could, you understand eat them everyday. They are that good and you two should have a Nobel Peace Prize for the amazing unique style of crust that you use for your delicious pizzas. I will say that I was almost brought to tears when your pepperoni pizzas were taken off the shelves for those looong months.
Your pizzas are a huge part of our lives. My husband eats several weekly. Now that I am pregnant I allow myself to eat more of your heavenly pies. I must tell you that you have earned a purple heart in my book as you saved my ass today! I really think tears, blood or worse would have had a part in this story if I hadn't been able to get one of your pepperoni delights.
Thank you for partnering up for such a wonderful cause as the most tantalizing pizza known to man's freezer. You ROCK!
Your biggest fan,

This my friends is a sad but true story. My oh so boring life has resulted in this. My brownies are beeping...remind me to tell you why I sat at my desk with a paperclip attached to my nose for at least 20minutes yesterday...again, true story.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Honest to Blog!

I have been meaning to blog, really I have...I just didn't think you wanted to hear about how crappy and tired I've felt. How no food sounds good and I'm tired of laying around doing nothing, but too tired to do anything about it. How I don't cook for my husband anymore and he has resorted to fast food and doritos (but hey, he is a big boy and is capable of cooking). How my house is the dirtiest it has ever been and how there are more clothes on the floor than in the closet.
But, on a far more interesting note (well, not really interesting, but not as "oh woe is me"...) I felt fabulous on Saturday and went to my cousins wedding reception. Honestly, she was the most beautiful bride I have ever seen. I know I'm partial because she's family, but seriously. The pics from the wedding at the beach are amazing! We ate, we danced and I was TIRED!
Therefore, I spent the entire day on Sunday laying around. Truly, that is all I did. I took a shower in the attempt to go to church, but alas, J had to go it alone (and I was quite proud of him for going without me...he filled me in on the funny British man I missed). For the first half the day I layed around and napped in my towel. Yes, going upstairs for a t-shirt was too much trouble. I did finally put on a t-shirt, though I never brushed my hair or put on any make-up...quite the mess I was.
We watched "Juno"...FINALLY!! I thought it was great, you go Ellen Page! Sooo cute. Jen Garner didn't have much of a part in my opinion and was almost lost in the movie, though that was probably because Ellen Page was soo awesome. (Jen also bored me a bit, but maybe her character was supposed to be boring, though it seemed like they wanted you to love her at times, which I did...I just think there was something missing). Good for you Justin Bateman to make a come back in such a good movie (though I don't know if I'd call it a "come back" what else have you done lately? maybe I'm just oblivious and he really had been around lately.) And little Michael Cera, I'm not sure if he can play other types of characters (b/c this guy was much like his character in Superbad, though a little more naive) but he's got cute geeky naive guy down pat. Can we be friends Ellen? I think she's in another movie coming out (supposedly she did it before Juno). I definitely want to see it. Go see Juno if you haven't...I reread my commentary to make sure I didn't give anything away, and I didn't. By the way, J is requesting that I yell "Thundercats are go!" Watch it, you'll see what I mean!
We also rented "I Am Legend"...though about 10 minutes into the movie the power went out, thank goodness I'd already eaten an early dinner! So we lit candles and talked on the couch...it really wasn't as sweet or boring as it sounds, just kinda peaceful and us. I went to bed early. Yep that's my life.
I am going to be a goon and order some maternity stuff from Old Navy. I could be wrong, but all the sizes are S, M, L, XL and I figure I'm a medium. Plus it's warm here through November most of the time anyway, so the clothes should fit at some point! They are having a 50% off sale thru Thursday so I'mma go online shopping when I get home. And it's not just maternity, but everything! Who knows, I might even order something baby =)
Oh how I wish I had something inspiring, uplifting, comical or interesting to say to you...but I don't. I'm lazy. But hey, at least I blogged...you had something to read!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Grease is the picture, from yummy pizza snacks

So my fatty Mc-fatterton butt needed some pizza snacks (seriously though they have kicked nausea's butt for the moment and I was hungry!) and I ate them...if I had my camera I'd take a picture of the grease stained paper towel they laid on...Oh well, you'll have to settle for the description.
Here are all the things I spied in the grease spots left on my paper towel by the yummy pizza snacks (yes, I am ready to go home from work):
jelly bean on a skateboard
alfred hitchcock
a hotdog on a skewer flanked by marshmellows
one of those ghosts from pac man
a snail with ears
a squirrel
a dog
a motorcycle
Looky there, 2 posts in one day! Both fabulously entertaining I'm sure you will agree! Go eat some pizza snacks, they are waaaaaay better than grits!

Solo Rideyourbooty, the N Train, my favorite G-Males and the Phantom of the Operator

No...I haven't blogged in days...no good reason other than being tired, lazy, and nauseous, yadda yadda yadda poor pitiful me. So on to the unusual title of today's blog.
Today class we will discuss the meaning of names like "Solo Rideyourbooty". I am not joking, I seriously heard this over the intercom system at work. I told you we (ok maybe just me) hear some weird names (I did hear Rob Petrie again the other day-aka Dick Van Dyke's character on the Dick Van Dyke Show). I was walking down my cube aisle and even met up with a cubewallmate along the way and we both looked at each other with puzzled expressions. I died laughing and she had to know why...I said "It sounded like they paged for 'Solo Rideyourbooty'", she also died laughing and thus we were buried right there in the cube aisle-nah, she said "you're delirious and need to go home". I can't help what my ears hear people...it's only for your entertainment.
All aboard! Get on the N Train, that being the Nausea Train. I know, I asked for it. I said I was "worried" that I wasn't sick, I was "sure" something was wrong. Well, hello reassurance in the form of "ugh, nothing sounds good to eat, ugh, I only want to stay in bed in my pj's and not take a bath for days, ugh, that smell makes me want to up my chucks all over you". So, that's the train I'm riding these days folks...Wonder what train Solo Rideyourbooty rides on?
Favorite G-males ("gay males")-being around J & R even if only for a few hours makes me miss them terribly and makes me sad that I don't have any fun g-males in my daily life. J (not my hubby Josh, different J), J and I go back all the way to kindergarten. We went ALL through school together, including undergrad. We even tied for 5th in our highschool graduating class and I was one of 2 girls at his first boy/girl birthday party waaaay back in the day. I love him and his man. Such fun and loving people. Plus how many of your friends squeal and kiss you on the cheek and give you hugs when you see them...and I got this even when they lived closer. I miss him terribly and am soo thankful for hanging out and talking for several hours last night like no time had passed at all. That's how you know you got a friend...you're comfortable together no matter how much time has passed and you lose track of time.
Last, but certainly not least, the Phantom of the Operator...I keep getting these 1 ring calls at work...every week I'd say I get one. One ring, so not enough time for me to answer. I know it's probably a wrong number, someone misdialed the extension. But hey, it's waay more interesting to feel like there is a Phantom..."inside my mind" =) (Plus I was quite proud "Phantom of the Operator"-hopefully you get that whether or not you are a geeky musical person like me)

Friday, April 11, 2008

Every hearbeat bears your name...

"...loud and clear they stake my claim. My red blood runs true blue, when every heartbeat belongs to you!" Ok, I really think I'm right on this one, pregnancy brain and all, that's Amy Grant. At least it's her voice I hear when I sing that song in my head and I was into her in middle school.
Anywho, before I go any further I want to say this...My baby has a heartbeat of 147 bpm, is implanted safely in my uterus, where my cervix is closed tight to keep baby in and baby is exactly EXACTLY how old I said it was...my calculations were PERFECT (just like my lil' embryo) 6 and 4/7 weeks, and finally is a whopping 7mm (also my HCG is 28,000, where it should be). I have a picture and papers from UNC's ER to prove it!
ER? EEEEEEEEERRRRRRR? You say? WHAT? Yes, ER. Well, I can be calm about it all now because of what I just told you about my perfect perfect baby (ok, let me go with the perfect for now, I had a hard day yesterday).
I'll try to give you the readers digest version, but you know I can talk. Plus I was in the ER for 6 hours! (imagine that!)
11:15 am I head to the potty at work...blood, red blood. I begin to shake and cry and go into shock and 5,900,765,234,180 thoughts ran through my head.
11:16 am Tara and I are in route to the Dr.'s office (luckily I have good friends and she offered to drive...probably for the best) Josh was in class and I g'chatted him to tell him, in the middle of class, poor thing and he left to meet us.
11:17 am Dr's office "we about to close for the day you'll have to call the triage nurse"
11:18 am Triage nurse "well, why don't you wait and see if it stops because you're not having any pain". Me, "NO I WANT TO BE SEEN!" Her, "Oh, you want to be seen, ok, let me put you back to the receptionist to see when we can work you in".
11:19 am Calling other offices because mine can't see me until 4:05 and that just won't do for me!
To make this long story a little not as long...I end up in the ER because that was what another nurse suggested to me after I'd called about 5 places with no luck.
UNC Hospitals...I'll have to tell you about all the interesting people at the ER later.
Finally, at 2 pm I'm undressed, in a lovely hospital gown with peeptoe black heels and there's my handsome baby daddy in his suit. Because he has a mock trial at 5pm and if you remember, I'm supposed to be the defendant.
The cutest sweetest blonde girl came to see me and she was my doctor...I love you! She was exactly the kind of doctor I needed yesterday, understanding, calming, reassuring and gentle.
I was sent up to ultrasound around 3. If you've never been wheeled through a hospital in nothing but your undies, a tacky hospital gown and your peeptoe shoes...I say it's a must! UGH!
Ultrasound at 3:15...we see the corpus luetem (sp?) cyst, which explains the pressure on my left side (this nourishes baby in the beginning) with the "ring of fire" around it. We were told we saw the right ovary, though I didn't see a thang! Then she moved towards the uterus...I saw a spec! She moved and got a better picture and said "there's your baby" and then I saw some flashing and could hardly wait for it and then she said "and there's the heartbeat". OMG! The happiest day and scariest day of my life! Josh and I held hands and just cried. Perfect...measurements, dates, heartbeat, perfect!
I still had to wait 30 minutes to be wheeled back downstairs to the ER and get a pelvic exam. And then wait several more hours for a private room for the exam so I didn't have to be behind just a curtain w/ other people around. Well...we ended up doing the exam behind the curtain. Cervix closed!
No explanation for the red blood...and as long as things stay healthy, I don't even care. Yes, it was a little scary hearing that stats say 50% of the time blood ends in miscarriage and 50% of the time pregnancies go on just fine. I have to believe and do believe this baby is meant to be and my little heartbeat "will go on and on".
Keep baby in your thoughts...Josh thinks it's a little girl just like me that needs immediate gratification...Like "hey mommy daddy look at me!! look at me now, don't wait 'til next week!!" (Because, just so you know, I found out a week earlier than most that I was pregnant, it was a Thursday...I saw the heartbeat a week earlier than I was scheduled to, it was a Thursday...and my due date is 11/28/2008 the Friday after Thanksgiving...um, yeah I'm betting baby shows up that Thursday just in time for Thanksgiving dinner =) )
You know what Mother Goose Says:
Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's child is full of grace,
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go.
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living,
But the child born on the Sabbath Day,
Is fair and wise and good and gay.

-My baby's going places!! And just FYI, I'm a Sunday baby (eh hem, the best one!).
PS-The nurse at my doctor's office was still calling this a "delayed menses". HEY LADY, I GOT THE PICTURE AND THEY EVEN TYPED "BABY" ON IT...A REAL LIFE HEARTBEATING BABY! KISS IT LADY!

Wednesday, April 9, 2008


Ok, so Stacy said I had to post a "happy" blog. Let me say, I am happy...it's just hard for me to feel like it's real. Yes, I spend hours looking up nursery stuff and strollers, etc etc. But, the enthusiasm doesn't always show and I know this. I think next Friday will make things feel more real. I do go into the guest bedroom where Tigger (daddy's first gift to baby) and blankie (grandma's first gift to baby) have been placed. And I day dream about going in there in the middle of the night to feed and rock him/her. I think about how it'll smell in there and how soft and sweet he/she will be. I think about all the cute clothes and happy giggles. I think about going to the beach for baby's first time (and in that daydream I'm the skinniest and most fit I have ever been and people come up to me and say "you just had a baby?!"...hey, it's a dayDREAM.) I think about birthday parties and cupcakes I'll bake for school. Snacks and lunches I'll pack...homework I'll help with and dance recitals/sports events I'll go to and be the loudest cheerleader there! I think about slip-n-slides in the backyard and trips to Disney World (where the entire family will wear Mickey Mouse ears...as long it looks cute with my hair). I think about hearing "mommy, I love you" and I think about bedtime stories and checking for monsters. And I think about the love. Now, there are those that would think I'm nuts, but I know most of you can understand...I LOVE MY DOG. We're pretty over the moon for him. We kiss him and hug him and take cuddly naps with him (I often wonder if he wasn't soo cute or soft if we'd love him this much...). He's the only "baby" we've known. We tuck him in at night (he prefers to sleep in his crate...he "gets" that it's bedtime when he's in there) and make sure he has a "friend" to sleep with. His stuffed animals have names and sometimes he's the cutest thing on the planet. I think about this love and I know that I will always love him...but I am about to know something different, a different kind of deep love. Different from what I feel for Josh, different from what I feel for my family and friends (even different from what I feel for JT-aka Justin Timberlake). And I'm happy. In the back of my mind I really believe this thing is meant to be, it's time and we're the chosen parents for this baby...yes I fret, but I think it's because I think that if I don't and I'm too confident that something might happen (though I truly don't believe the universe works that way).
So just like the cheer that we did when I was 10 and cheering for Don's Music City (red and white uniforms) "I'm so enthusiastic, I'm H-A-P-P-Y!" I am. I'm just also still in a state of shock. So I will try, I will try to fret less and show the happiness more.
PS-Wish me luck, Josh has a "mock trial" tomorrow that takes the place of his final. I'm the defendant and we're doing the trial in a real courthouse and everything! I'll have to be cross-examined...there will be objections and overrulings and everything! I must say I'm a bit nervous, but excited at the same time...because y'all, this could be my big break. I could be discovered as the next "it girl" actress...of course if they give me my own show in the next few months they'll have to hide my belly behind shopping bags and chairs and oversized coats. But they would do that for a talent like mine. I'll let you know how it goes (unless I'm convicted and carted off to jail...in which case Josh will contact you for bail money).

Monday, April 7, 2008

Tears or Fears

So yes...the fear goes on...the ultrasound is still 2 WEEKS AWAY PEOPLE! That is a long friggin' time!! I want someone to tell me that everything is fine, will be fine and will stay fine. You won't blow up into a hippo, you won't throw your guts up and you will be able to sleep like the 8lb baby Jesus. I want to know that the delivery will go wonderfully easy and safe. And, that the baby is alive and will stay alive and be perfect! So...which one of you is going to say that and have me love you forever (and not believe you all at the same time). Obviously I could go on and on about my fears. Instead, I'll tell you what's been bringing me to tears (other than fears):
-The Cosby Show (Dr. Huxtable telling-crap what's her name, not Rudy, but the one older than Rudy...ugh my brain has stopped working! Anyway, telling one of his girls how hard it is to be a teenager)
-People giving away money on Oprah's Big Gift (just the commercial, I didn't even watch the episode)
-Not having french fries at my desk today, nor a car to get them
-Seeing an unfortunate looking couple have a baby on TLC and immediately thinking they were the cutest people on Earth
-when the mom and daughter on Little People Big World saw a whale
-the preacher at church (I pretty much cried the whole service...all about trust)
-reading the news article about the good luck charms soldiers carry with them
-thinking about having my very own baby, mine mine mine mine mine
There's probably more...but I can't think of it all right now. That's another thing, my brain isn't working well lately. I am extremely forgetful. Like I'll start to do something and before I can really do it, I'll forget what I was doing.
Like now, I'm watching Little People Big World and I forgot I was blogging.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008


So, in an effort to post more than once a week. I'm posting tonight. Nothing exciting to report. Not even any weird names announced over the work intercom. The baby front is boring on the outside (To the Grain of Rice...Mama knows you are very busy growing and working really hard even if I can't tell...I'm proud of you.) I'm not sick, yet. I did have a mildly embarrassing episode of diarrhea today at work (I made it to the bathroom, 4 people just happened to come in in the midst of the smelliness). Tired, very tired.
See boring.
Plus, I don't want to bore you with the boring tales of nothing.
So I went to Charleston this past weekend for my cousin's bachelorette party. It was fun, we wore funky colored wigs 'cause we were "wiggin' out". I highly recommend it. Even if it's for a birthday or a bachelorette party. Something about wearing a wig makes you feel different...plus you don't have to worry about your hair. We got loads of attention and since my wig was purple I got a few Jem and the Holograms shout outs. I did love that show. Perhaps I will dress as knocked up Jem for Halloween this year.
Idol is on (see I'm boring I'm just rambling) and I really just think it's time for Kristi Lee Cook to head back home. She's not an American Idol. I'm not going to say mean things because I can't sing. I will say I thought it was going to be weird hearing all these people sing Dolly songs...don't get me wrong I loved me some Dolly and Kenny Rogers back in the day. And hey, I have been to Dollywood. But, I was concerned about everyone sounding hokey. To my surprise for most it went a lot better than I expected. Let's just be clear, it's going to (or should) come down to David Cook and Carly Smithson (I like Jason, Brooke and Michael...David Archuletta is awesome, but not for American Idol...he's not a pop singer. He's gifted, but not an Idol. Hey, we all have our opinions) and between the two I can't really say who I'd vote for. I really like both of them equally. David seems to pick awesome arrangements, but Carly is sooo likeable and has an accent I'd love to have.
Ok well, this has been enough rambling about nothing.
Oh, last thing...That lie detector show, I've never watched an episode, but let me just say it can "Kiss my grits!" I think that's the most horrible thing ever on television. Again, just my opinion, even if it is right.
OK, the last last thing, go read the article about Jenny McCarthy and her son's recovery from autism. Go into it with an open mind. I want to learn more (especially more about how to put the link to that article on here...basically I'm too lazy right now).